Here are the latest eps of my (sporadically released ;) Geek Tawk Pod...You can check out older eps under "Podp-ass-t", if ya like. :)
Wanna send The Last Drive In some Snail Mail? The addy for that is:
215 Thompson St. #113
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Here's where you can find Mr. Joe Bob (and sometimes me ;), if'n that's a thing that interests ya! (Updated on the reg, so check back often! :)
Alamo Drafthouse Winchester, VA
An Evening with Joe Bob Briggs
Alamo Drafthouse Winchester, VA
Ho-llywood Theatre Portland, OR
An Evening with Joe Bob Briggs (and Darcy! :)
Ho-llywood Theatre Portland, OR
Weeeeeee're Baaaaaaack!! A frightfully festive mini-marathon streaming live on Shudder.com!
Spooky Empire, Tampa FL
We will be partying HALLOWEEN STYLE all weekend!!!
Spooky Empire, Tampa FL
Circle Cinema, Tulsa OK
An Evening w JBB and DP :)
Circle Cinema, Tulsa OK
In the same vein as dolls, scarecrows are creepy as heck! That's to be eXXXpected of anything with "scare" in its name, but they ho-ld ho-rror for more than just our fine-feathered friends. They resemble humans, limbs and all... but they are eternally inert. At least, that's what our rational brains say; it's the imagination that animates them, gives them life that isn't actually there. And the more we gaze at them, the more we begin to trust the imagination; we begin to doubt logic and imbue the straw-stuffed strangers with not just life but malignance. Their stitched faces begin to emote and contort; no matter ho-w lifeless we know them to be, our pliable minds make monsters of them. We tell ourselves that it's foolishness... but what if it isn't? What if scarecrows are just... waiting? You don't have to have wings and a beak to find that scary!
And if it's scary, we will eXXXalt it! In ho-nor of the cornfield creatures, we have compiled a list of the five most A-MAIZE-ing scarecrow scare-actors in fiction. Now, some of these corncob creeps are flesh-folks who have assumed the appearance of the scarecrow, but they still illustrate this important point: scarecrows are freaking creepy! Whether stuffed with hay or human beings, these scarecrows truly scare! And that's all that matters, Kinky Kreeps!
The Scarecrow/Dr. Jonathan Crane - The "Batman" Franchise:
The self-proclaimed "Master of Fear," DC's Scarecrow is a real gas... in that he GASSES his victims with Fear ToXXXin! An Ichabod Crane lookalike who eXXXploits fear and wears a freaky mask, Scarecrow sounds like a guy who'd be the life of any Halloween party! In addition to being a fright-favoring fiend, Crane has some major ho-rror credentials: he was voiced by both Jeffrey "Re-Animator" Combs and Robert "Freddy Krueger" Englund. Putting the "Goth" in "Gotham," The Scarecrow is DC's #1 Ho-rror Lord!
Scarecrows - "Scarecrows" (1988)
Believe it or not, the concept of the killer scarecrow is fairly new. The '80s gave us the first murderous scarecrow movie, and they also gave us the first film with multiple murderous scarecrows: the aptly-named "Scarecrows!" In this film, the eponymous monsters are the spirits of Satanic farmers... or something. Okay, the backstory is pretty vague, but you know what isn't? The fact that these scarecrows are out for blood... buckets of it! They stab, slash, slice, gut, and even bite fingers off! If they need a brain, they'll just reach into someone's skull and take it! Watch these tattered terrors with a gag-bag nearby!
Dr. Syn - "Dr. Syn, Alias the Scarecrow":
Hey, look! It's a heroic scarecrow!
Though on the side of good, Dr. Syn is still as harrowing as any haunter. With a sickening cackle and a gruesome disguise, he's up there with Darkman and The Spectre when it comes to ghoulish avengers. And he's as creepy as he is... in a Disney picture! There have been a few adaptations of this particular tale (including a Hammer film en-tit-led "Night Creatures"), but this one beats 'em all on the spooky scarecrow scale! And if you don't dig his theme song, you're not someone with whom we want to associate! (Kidding... we think.) Hail the scary savior!
Harold - "Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark":
The "Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark" series has produced a plethora of traumatizing bugaboos, so it really means something when we say that Harold stands above them all! First appearing in "Scary Stories 3: More Tales to Chill Your Bones," Harold has become a sort of mascot; he was even heavily featured in the promotional material for the film adaptation. Stephen Gammell's original illustration is a nightmare-inducing masterpiece, and the movie version captures his hideous features perfectly. Considering that Harold made his cinematic debut this year, you could really say that 2019 was a dark year of the scarecrow; but a year always starts with a night...
Bubba - "Dark Night of the Scarecrow":
Here it is: the ORIGINAL killer scarecrow film! What other film can boast such an accomplishment AND a ringing endorsement from THE Vincent Price? No other, dear friends! This one-of-a-kind shocker features the best killer scarecrow and a performance by site favorite Larry Drake. If you only watch one of these, make it this one!
Heck, we'll make it easy for ya: the link is directly below! Check it out, Kinky Kreeps!
Ho-wdy, Ho-rror Ho-mies!
As if to signify the end of fright month, Shudder's "Creepshow" concluded its first season on Halloween. The wonderfully weird (and weirdly wonderful) adaptation of the 1982 Stephen King/George A. Romero anthology feature is everything a delightfully depraved deviant could possibly crave: spook stories written and directed by the masters, blood-chilling performances by ho-rror icons, comic-style visuals, gore, ghouls, gags, and a fine assortment of monsters. It's artisan-crafted terror for the sophisticated palette; gore-mets who enjoy the rich taste of "Tales from the Crypt" and EC comics ought to be satiated. And if you appreciate fine "whine," "Creepshow's" hapless humans have you covered!
So, you're new to this beastly bistro, and you don't know what to order? Don't fret, dear guest: we'll be your waiter for the evening. While we recommended you try the entire menu, we have arranged "Creepshow's" segments in order from least monstrous to most macabre! Every single story is worth your time, so don't skip the ones on the bottom! The ones on top, however, are some of the most delectably devilish morsels TV has offered in some time! Please enjoy our selections and... BONE appe-Creep!
"Lydia Layne’s Better Half":
"Lydia kills her lover and needs to hide the evidence... but after an earthquake, she gets trapped inside an elevator with the body."
A tense thriller with plenty of suspense and a few gasps, "Lydia Layne" is a fairly effective yelp-yarn that updates the EC-style morality play for the modern age. "But why is it so low," you ask? Well, it doesn't have any monsters! Sure, it's got a few supernatural jolts, but we're here for slime-crusted creatures! Without a proper bugaboo, we cannot rank this one above the other monster-heavy tales! Ho-wever, it does have one particularly gruesome effect; one that puts it a-Head of the average anthology offering.
"Dr. Sloan discovers a cure to weight loss in a rare fat-sucking leech."
Now we're in Creature Country! Once you know the basic premise, you can surmise the basic outcome. With that said, it's still a gas of a segment! Dana Gould of "The Simpsons" is a rather likable lead, and the effects are gooey perfection! And, much like in real life, junk food saves the day! "Skincrawlers" is a jocular jolt-fest for those who like their ho-rror sticky and their comedy black.
"Night of the Paw":
"A killer gets stranded in a funeral home with a mortician and his monkey paw."
A cl-ass-sick indeed! This segment doesn't reinvent the squeal, but it's a solid take on a beloved chiller. Bruce Davison knocks it out of the park as the mortician, and the zombies are aces. The scenes in the graveyard are evocative of the old Gothic creepers we adore so very much; there's more than a little Hammer in its DNA. We give this one two monkey's thumbs up!
"Bad Wolf Down":
"A platoon of American soldiers finds something more sinister than war behind enemy lines."
Jeffrey Combs and werewolf pulp? Do we even need to type another word?! Of all the segments, this may be the one that's most aesthetically like a comic book. In keeping with that giant-size "Creepshow" spirit, the werewolves transform through comic panels, giving us a truly novel take on the lycan-trope. For monsters versus Nazi action, this one's a howl and a half!
"By the Silver Water of Lake Champlain":
"Rose believes she found Champ, the legendary monster of Lake Champlain, but the real monster may still be out there..."
"Creepshow" begins with a story by original writer Stephen King; the season ends with a story by his son, Joe Hill. Mr. Hill was also the little boy with the power of voodoo in the '82 film, and OG effects man Tom Savini directed this one. And for a segment with so much "Creepshow" credit, it's... surprisingly sweet. If you were to remove the splatter, this would be a great family story! If you're like us and you sympathize with noble monsters, this one's going to break your heart. Don't watch this one without tissues!
"After the death of a loved one, a drinking habit becomes insatiable."
Speaking of King, this is the aforementioned story that starts the series. Adrienne Barbeau of the original stars in a far more pleasant roles than she played in '82. The stormy atmosphere is properly chilling, and King's cl-ass-sick themes are prevalent throughout. But, as is the case with most segments, the monster really puts this one over the top! Cheers!
"Times is Tough in Musky Holler":
We're going to be honest: this one is up high because we love David Arquette. (Sorry, the man's a dreamboat!) But that aside, this is a nifty lil' zombie-er told in nonlinear fashion. Come for David, stay for undead justice!
Bob. This is Bob's show. What about Bob? Well, you'll have to see for yourself, but he's destined to replace dogs and cats as man's most beloved buddy! And the story he inhabits is a scream; just don't believe every word of it. In Bob we trust!
"The Man in the Suitcase":
To us, the very best segments marry the old and new: they update venerable creeps in ways that satisfy both veteran fright-seekers and newcomers alike. The concept here is older than Dracula, but it feels as fresh as can be! It's funny, it's frightful, and nasty in the best possible way; in other words, it's "Creepshow!" Talk about pure gold!
Oh, how we love sinister scarecrows! Even a bad scarecrow scare-story is worth a watch, so great one is next to godliness... and this is a great one! Fairytale atmosphere, moody visuals, and THE CREEPIEST DAMN SCARECROW EVER make this one a cl-ass-sick! Plus, it has a shout-out to everyone's favorite Crispin Glover character. What's not to love?
"All Hallows Eve":
Trick and treat in equal measures, this seasonal play combines the bitter with the sweet. It's heartwarming in a way that never betrays the macabre spirit of the season. Beautiful, nostalgic, and just a little gruesome, this one's a fall fable with a Bradbury kick.
"The House of the Head":
This is it: this is the segment that made us love "Creepshow." There have been many dollhouse shockers before, but this may be our favorite! Young Cailey Fleming is perfect, the head is ho-rrible, and the chills are beyond inspired. We mean, this is a segment that makes you fear for tiny, plastic people! When it was over, we knew we had to watch every single episode! Funny and freaky, this is what "Creepshow" should be! A monsterpiece!
My Boss Man Interviews Robert Forster in this 1992 Drive In Theater interview.
Big thanks to the fine folks at MasiMedia who got this shindig together, and also to Mr. Roger Jackson (pictured intro-ing a screening of the film in Stu's backyard!! :) who not only came out to party with us, but-t also left me this terrifying vm that I will treasure for the neXXXt billion centuries!! :) xoxo
My Interview with Clint Freakin' Howard!!!
(nude Clint Howard and snow globes...need I say more?)
High History: Why I love Scream so much!
(remember to finish him)
This shit is legit.